Because the Eurovision Song Contest 2022 is coming closer, I’ve decided to write some more posts about this. I don’t like the fact that the juries are usually morons and that most of the tele-voting is done on a “we like this country the most”, rather than “we like this song the most”. But every now and then, there are a few songs that really stand out, either because they’re very very very good, or very very very bizarre. So I wanted to take a look at some of the masterpieces that competed in the contest along the years.

The weird, but in a bad way

Todomondo - Liubi, Liubi, I Love You
Romania - 2007

In 2007, Romania was facing a question no one asked: “what language should we sing?” and the answer was “Yes.” Thus, Todomondo was created. Six guys, singing the same thing in six languages wearing six costumes representing six countries stereotypes, trying to appeal to the pan-European taste. Did they make it? Only to 13th place, bad luck, which is as bad as the fact that while this song is utter crap, it’s an earworm that will stick with you for days.

Lena - Taken By A Stranger
Germany - 2011

After her great success in 2010, Lena tried once more to get the Eurovision title. However, the decisions behind creating this song were … strange. While the sound of it is nice, recalling of film-noir smoking-allowed cafes, she tries unsuccessfully to be seductive. And the lyrics? “Stranger things are startin' to begin” and “danger is a risky business” take the cake for probably the worst lyrics written. By anyone. Ever.

Ilinca ft. Alex Florea - Yodel It!
Romania - 2017

I can’t. Really. Listen for yourself and guess what drugs were using the people that wrote this. This is what happens when you cross “what the fuck” with “b-b-but why?”. Be warned, this shit will stick in your head for months. Oh, it even has sexual assault at the end.

The weird, but in a good way

Zdob Si Zdub - Boonika Bate Toba
Moldova - 2005

This is a great energetic song, it’s filled with local references “the Gypsy Jimmy Hendrix”, “she wanna play Geamparale to make you spin”. Great song, topless front singer Roman having national patterns painted on him, bringing up a grandma on stage to beat a big drum, all these add up for a great Eurovision memory.

Sunstroke Project & Olia Tira - Run Away
Moldova - 2010

This song is great, it’s super catchy, is fun, the singers have excellent voices, but it will forever be remembered as the birthplace of the legendary Epic Sax Guy meme.

Rambo Amadeus - Euro Neuro
Montenegro - 2012

This song is madness. It’s a crazy critique towards the EU, its governments and its ideals, all packed into a snarky and ridiculous piece. It’s brilliant because he somehow got there.

Who See - Igranka
Montenegro - 2013

The following year, Montenegro managed to smash the competition again. Rappers in astronaut suits, beats out of this world, dubstep chorus and the great voice of Nina Žižić. A great song to hit the raves when eveyone’s drunk and don’t know the lyrics anyway.

The very very very good

Antique - (I Would) Die for you
Greece - 2001

Crazy that this song lost to a generic dance song back in 2001, because it’s got all the ingredients for a hit: good beats, live acoustic bouzouki played by Nikos, a young Helena Paparizou with a great voice. It even topped some charts in Europe and is generally considered a Greek pop classic.

Luminita Anghel & Sistem - Let Me Try
Romania - 2005

Luminita and Sistem did a great performance of their song in Ukraine. Her great voice, the yellow barrels percussion, the axle grinders and pyrotechnics gave this song a fighting chance for winning. Sadly, they finished only 3rd.

Nelly Ciobanu - Hora Din Moldova
Moldova - 2009

In 2009, Moldova sent a great song, with strong national influences, costume, dancers, lyrics, everything was great. This is proper modern pop folklore music

Paula Seling & Ovi - Playing With Fire
Romania - 2010

This entrance is one of the best entries Romania has ever sent to Eurovision. It’s fun, it’s energetic, has a duet piano, has Paula’s great voice.

Francesco Gabbani - Occidentali’s Karma
Italy - 2017

This song is brilliant, it’s super happy, properly done Italian pop music. It’s nothing short of what our expectations of a Sanremo winner can be. In my opinion, it should have won, but that year the jury decided others were better.

Manizha - Russian Woman
Russia - 2021

With their song, Russia has proven in 2021 that folklore done right is a safe bet. Mix that with an empowering message and you get a great song. They got only 9th place, but 2021 competition was tough.